DonkeyHotey / Flickr Donald Trump Caricature...
DonkeyHotey / Flickr

OK Donnie boy, time to pay the piper. Did you honestly think that you’d be able to keep pulling the same lame stunt over and over again, and never have that ball bounce back in your own direction? Fat chance laddie.

When it comes to the Trump-Russia investigation, His Lowness is a lawyers worst nightmare. He’s brash, impetous, refuses to follow directions, and worst of all, just will not shut his big fat pie hole. But on other issues and matters, he is a lawyers guaranteed comfortable retirement.

Donald Trump is the official Litigator in Chief. Trump loves lawsuits. He loves to sue people, often for ridiculous reasons. He sued Trumpworld author Tim O’Brien for billions of dollars in damages for the grievous sin of asserting that Trump was not actually worth billions of dollars personally. His first response to criticism or adversity is to threaten to sue the source of his aggravation. Trump even appears to love being sued. A true wimp physically, being sued is a way for Trump to thump his chest, loudly proclaiming what a tough, hardass mofo he is.

Byt, as in all things Trump, he’s basically full of shit. Trump has a perception problem. Because he uses lawsuits as knee jerk reactions to pressure and criticism, without actually understanding the intricacies of the law,  most of the lawsuits he files tend to be thrown out of court. LIke the boy who cried wolf, Trump also dilutes the threat of lawsuits by threatening everybody who bumps into him on the street with a lawsuit publicly, and then fails to actually file one. And his other problem is that, being basically a lawless person, who feels the rules don’t apply to him, when other people sue him, they tend to take him to the cleaners. The Trump University lawsuit is a perfect example, as is the lien on his property in Florida as the result of a successful lawsuit by a small merchant that he spartially stiffed on for work done on the property.

The reason I bring this up is that it is topically relevant. The White House just announced a couple of days ago that Trump had officially disbanded his vaunted election fraud advisory board. But in a bizarre twist, the termination notice advised the recipients to retain all records from their work. The stated reason was to bring to a close multiple lawsuits in court that would require taxpayer funding to defend. The warning to retain records was due to the fact that the lawsuits are still pending. In other words, Trump kicked Kris Kobach to the curb in order to stop lawsuits  before he took it in the shorts in court again.

Suing Trump is a sure winner for two reasons. First, it works.  Not only Trump University and the vendor lawsuits have succeeded, but his unconstitutional Muslim travel ban has also had success in court, it’s now awaiting a Supreme Court decision. And I have little doubt that Trump’s vindictive actions against so called sanctuary cities will also find success in the courts. His military transgender order was deemed unconstitutional by a federal district court, and the Pentagon isn’t even waiting for an appeal before allowing transgender applicants on January 1st. The second upside is that Trump takes these assaults personally. He obsesses over them. Hence, it becomes a distraction, keeping him from concentrating on other, more odious things he could be plotting. And often, his outrage leads him to angrily tweet or speak out, damaging his own case.

Suing Trump and the administration as often as feasibly possible is a viable option. Not only does it outrage and distract him when his perceived authority is questioned, and not only do his imperious laws and proclamations tend to be legally questionable, but most importantly, because his Justice Department has an abysmal record in court i defending them. As KC and the Sunshine Band used to sing, “Keep it coming love, keep it coming love, don’t stop it now.”

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