CBC News / YouTube Does Robert Mueller have the goods...
CBC News / YouTube

Well, well, well. Another lowlife precinct heard from. Alan Dershowitz, the “crazy Uncle Ernie” at the legal Thanksgiving dinner table, popped his head out of his hole a full two months early to see his shadow, and opened his mouth again. And he actually told the truth for a change. But not the truth that His Lowness really wanted spread around like manure on a field. Dershowitz imparted not one, not two, but three inconvenient truths for all the world to see.

Dershowitz was a veritable wellspring of toxic sewage news for Trump. First, he admitted the fact that, while it might not be constitutionally devastating for Trump, it was going to be politically devastating. second, he tipped the Trump response strategy, saying that Mueller would issue a devastating report, Trump would issue an official response, and then it would be up to the American public to decide. And last, but by no means least, Dershowitz said that as far as he was concerned, Trumps greatest danger wasn’t actually from the Mueller report, it was from the continuing investigations in the Southern District of New York.

Let’s take them one at a time. In the first statement, Dershowitz admits that the Mueller report will be “politically devastating.” Ummm, why? If this whole thing is nothing more than a baseless “witch hunt,” perpetrated by “12 angry Democrats” or whatever, how can anything Mueller has to say even be damaging to Trump, much less politically devastating?

Skipping to Professor Dumbledork’s third assertion, why could the SDNY investigations be even more damaging to trump than the Mueller report? If the Mueller report will be politically devastating, what kind of stuff must the SDNY elves be building in their toy workshop? Could it be that they are investigating tax crimes that have no statute of limitations, and that could comeback to bite Trump in his plush toy ass once he leaves office? Not only legally, but financially? Could it be that the investigations are centering on family members like Ivanka, Donnie Redux, and Jared Kushner? People who can be indicted and tried because they are not currently the leader of the free world?

But to my eye, it’s the second admission that should worry Trump the most. In it, Dershowitz tips the mitts of Trump’s team, both legal and political. They are not worried about Trump being indicted, believing, probably with good reason, that Mueller will not buck DOJ tradition and indict Trump. And they are confident that the GOP controlled Senate would never impeach him. Both are likely safe assertions. But the one about Mueller issuing a report, Trump responding to it, and then leaving it to the American people to decide is problematic.

Look, forget about Trump’s “core” base of supporters for a minute. I’m not talking about the drooling dotards that keep the red MAGA hat cottage industry ticking right along. I’m talking about moderates, independents, and the people who, while they may support Trump, have limits to their support. You know, a large chunk of the general population of the United States.

Trump likely has a major problem with this strategy. Since day one, Trump has portrayed the Mueller investigation as a baseless, partisan “witch hunt.” You can’t believe a single word that comes out of their partisan, lying sewer holes. Who are you going to believe, a bitter partisan hack, who thought he got screwed on his greens fees, or the President of the United States? And it is highly likely that this contention is going to turn out to be no bueno.

Look at it this way. Say you take your car to the shop for an oil change. You’re sitting in the waiting room, suffering through “The View,” when the manager comes in and tells you that you have a problem, your U joint is shot. Your first thought is that the grubby bastard is trying to stick you with a high prices, unnecessary repair, buz you’re a rube. But then, the manager takes you out to the bay, and shows you the damage, and you realize that there’s no way he could have engineered it himself.

Trump’s entire defense against Mueller’s accusations are an act of pure faith. It’s one thing to vilify an opponent when he can’t defend himself, to tell the world he’s full of shit, and misrepresenting the evidence. But that Pollyanic existence isn’t going to continue forever. Sooner or later, most likely sooner, Robert Mueller is going to break his silence, and he’s going to do it with a neutron bomb, even Dershowitz admits this.

It isn’t going to his-word-against-mine anymore. Mueller’s report is going to include hard facts, and documentary evidence to boot. Mueller is going to display intelligence data, bank records, tax returns, phone logs, e-mails, the whole magilla. And let’s not forget FBI interview and grand jury testimony from direct participants. This is why even a logically challenged soul like Alan Dershowitz says that the Mueller report is going to be politically devastating.

Because faith only stands until verifiable facts and evidence come along and tear it down. Faith any purer faith requires almost religious faith, and Trump sure as hell ain’t no deity. Trump has put all of his eggs into one basket, he is betting that the American public, at least enough to save him, are suckers. His entire line of defense is in fact the punch line to the old joke about a philandering husband, caught in the act, who implores his wife, Who are you going to believe? Me, or your lying eyes?” And personally, I like to think that it was a great punch line then, and it’s gonna be just as funny when Trump tells it.

If you enjoyed this article, please consider becoming a patron to help keep the site running.

Follow me on Twitter at @RealMurfster35

Liked it? Take a second to support Joseph "Murfster35" Murphy on Patreon!

This is a Creative Commons article. The original version of this article appeared here.


  1. It all comes down to an old saying, don’t piss down my back and tell me it’s raining! and that’s what the dotard has been doing.


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here