Dave Rubin is a political commentator and talk show host who appears on YouTube and BlazeTV, a conservative network that also hosts famed Algonquin Diaper-Changing Station members Glenn Beck, Mark Levin, and, erm, one of those Duck Dynasty dudes. You know, the one with the shitty beard. No, not the shitty Rip Van Winkle beard. The other one. The one that looks like a rent-by-the-hour motel for boisterously horny sea otters. You know, that  guy.

Anyway, Rubin was so incensed by climate activist and former Time Person of the Year Greta Thunberg’s recent speech at a youth climate summit in Milan, Italy, that he brought out the big guns: The teenage activist who mocked world leaders for failing to act on an existential threat to—checks notes … oh, here it is—the fucking planet is tantamount to Hitler. Because, well, just go with it, okay?

Well, they were both white Europeans, and … yeah, that’s about it.


RUBIN: “Okay, I don’t even think I have to address anything that she said there in her ‘blah, blah, blah’ speech, but I wanted to show it because of the tone and the anger and then the masked clones all applauding her at the end as she’s telling us how everyone before her are basically evil, that’s what she’s saying. ‘They’ve had their chance, now it’s our chance.’ Just imagine if this girl had enough power, the horrible things that she would do to people, like I’m not going to be the only one who could see, like, little sort of imagery of Hitler speaking up there. … These people that think that they can control the world, and if you just gave them enough money and enough power they could do it. Man, we have unearthed something so horrible by our elite class and our intellectual class being so dishonest with us for so long, we have unleashed something that basically every Western nation is under attack from every which direction. But that anger of that little girl it’s just disturbing. Anyway, I wanted to show you that because it’s just, like, where are the adults? We need some adults.”

Rubin, of course, was responding to Thunberg’s exasperation with the many world leaders who have, so far anyway, done little more than give lip service to meaningful climate action. She’s not wrong, of course, but even if she were, it would be a bit much to, you know, compare her to a genocidal maniac who was famously bent on ethnic cleansing and world conquest.

Yes, imagine if this little girl had enough power—the horrible things she would do to people. Like give them good-paying green-energy jobs, reduce the amount of deadly particulate matter in the air they breathe, invest heavily in a renewable energy economy, take on the worst excesses of the fossil fuel industry, and—worst of all—sharply reduce greenhouse-gas emissions in order to secure a sustainable future for her generation and generations to come. Horrors!

Where are the adults, indeed? Because they sure as shit aren’t on BlazeTV, now are they?

It made comedian Sarah Silverman say, “THIS IS FUCKING BRILLIANT,” and prompted author Stephen King to shout “Pulitzer Prize!!!” (on Twitter, that is). What is it? The viral letter that launched four hilarious Trump-trolling books. Get them all, including the finale, Goodbye, Asshat: 101 Farewell Letters to Donald Trump, at this link. Or, if you prefer a test drive, you can download the epilogue to Goodbye, Asshat for the low, low price of FREE.

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