I go to parties, sometimes until 4. It’s hard to leave when you can’t find the door Joe Walsh Life’s been good to me so far
No, I’m not talking about that Joe Walsh. That Joe Walsh doesn’t need politics, he has marketable job skills. I’m talking about the other Joe Walsh, the wingnut former Tea Party GOP congressman from Illinois.
Apparently, Joe Walsh is out to prove that it doesn’t just have to be vile, blowhard, narcissistic failed reality show idjits that can have presidential delusions of grandeur, former GOP congressional slobs with failed conservative talk radio shows can have them too! According to reporting in both Axios, as well as Politico, Walsh is preparing to announce a run against Trump in the 2020 GOP Presidential primaries.
As former Director of National Intelligence Dan Coats told Andrea Mitchell last year, “Yeah. that will be special.” Trump already has an announced opponent in the GOP primaries, former Massachusetts Governor and 2016 Libertarian Vice Presidential candidate William Weld. But Weld is a traditional conservative candidate, another of the 16 varieties of GOP kitty litter that Trump ran roughshod over in 2016. Watching that fight would be about as entertaining as watching a harried mother try to put her four year old down for his nap. With Joe Walsh in the race, it’s going to look more like a political version of Who Framed Roger Rabbit?
So, tho the hell is Joe Walsh? Like I said, he’s a former Tea Party congressman from the suburbs of Illinois, with all of the chattel baggage that the description entails. Like Glorious Bleater, Walsh has never met either a slur or a conspiracy theory that he didn’t like. Upon first entering congress, Walsh’s first oral fart was to accuse then President Barack Obama of abandoning the US-Israel compact, and of “bankrupting the country.” His high water mark for absurdity was in 2016, when he channeled his inner Caribou Barbie, and uttered on his schlock radio show, “If Hillary wins, I’m grabbing my musket!” See what I mean? If Walsh beats Trump, the only noticeable difference is going to be about 20 years.
Unfortunately, Joe Walsh is already starting out behind the 8-ball. Besides battling an incumbent President with high popularity among the racist, chin dribbling GOP base, low national name recognition, and a fledgling campaign, Walsh is already having to paddlefoot away from previous positions, one embarrassing one in particular. Ya see, back in 2016, it appears that Joe Walsh thought that Donald Trump was the bees knees. He was a loud, vocal supporter of Trump in 2016, and in his early radio days, a vocal supporter or all of Trump’s claptrap.
But in an op-ed in the New York Times, Walsh went whole hog in denouncing his one time Savior. And he chastised the current GOP for continuing to support an “unfit racist arsonist.” Walsh went balls-to-the-wall in his op-ed, even apologizing to Obama for the nasty things he had said, including that Obama only got elected because he was a black man, and urged fellow Republicans to join him in his come-to-Jesus moment with political sanity. Unfortunately, this recent conversion to sweetness-and-light is unlikely to pass much muster with mainstream conservatives familiar with his history of inflammatory rhetoric and general, all purpose assholery.
Unfortunately, if his plan of battle is to go after Trump’s racist wingnut base as an alternate kind of kindred spirit, and using his radio talk show audience as a jumping off point, he’s already in deep kim chi. His radio talk show is tanking. It’s tanking mainly because Walsh was such a strong early supporter of Trump, his audience is Trump’s audience. And as of late, Walsh’s audience has been dumping shit all over his head for his loud and frequent criticism of Glorious Bleater. So, let’s see. Traditional conservatives trust him as far as they can throw him, and Trump supporters are ready to roast him on a spit over an open fire for apostasy. This should be smooth sailing.
So, for all of you who are bored with the 2020 Democratic primaries so far, what with all of the candidates spending most of their time hammering Trump instead of each other, and bogging you down with, like, details and shit, the Trump-Walsh match up should be right up your alley. It will be like the slap fight scene in Dumb and Dumber. However, Walsh does have one advantage going into this clash-of-the-titans against Trump. I don’t think that Walsh’s father even knew Lee Harvey Oswald.