The Guy Who Can’t Finish a Joe Bazooka Comic Strip Says He Read an Entire Book About Himself in One Night

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It took me a couple of weeks to read Bob Woodward’s first book about the Trump reign, Fear. Granted, Woodward’s books about the various presidencies and such are slower and more in-depth reads than the average summer beach read or your roomnate’s manga collection. But I’m a very fast reader, and in between job and family responsibillities, it took me about twelve days to get to the final page.

Trump says he read Woodward’s second book on his administration, Rage, in a single night. All 466 pages of it. He said:

I actually got to read it last night. I read it very quickly and it was very boring.

No, he didn’t.

Trump wouldn’t have read a 20-page Richie Rich comic book in a single night. Trump doesn’t read. His advisors have boiled down the daily intelligence briefing to a single note card with three bullet points — and he doesn’t read the third bullet point.

And don’t think Trump has just recently lost his taste for the written word. As Jonathan Chait writes for the New Yorker:

One interview more than 30 years ago tried to pin him down on a book he has read, and after trying to say he reread his own book, Trump claimed to have read the book his hosts had just named for him, but then was unable to say anything about the book, including its title, other than that the author “did a great job.”

He should probably turn a few pages in Woodward’s latest book. He might be interested to know what we already know:

  • he deliberately and systematically lied about the pandemic, directly causing the needless deaths of tens of thousands of Americans;
  • how easily Kim Jong Un used flattery to turn Trump into his sycophant;
  • the boundless depths of his insecurity, to the point where he hired an actor to portray Obama so he could berate and then “fire” him on camera;
  • what a fucking racist he is.

Woodward concludes, “Trump is the wrong man for the job.”

My conclusion: Ya think, Bobby boy? In his review of Rage, Slate columnist Fred Kaplan writes of Woodward:

He’s an unparalleled amasser of secret documents, inside facts, dazzling scoops. But he’s also a prisoner of those scoops. He doesn’t quite know what to do with them. He fastidiously counts all the rings on the fallen trees, but doesn’t look closely at the forest or why the trees fell.

That’s okay. We can do that for him. We can judge him, kick him out of office, and hold him accountable for the crimes against humanity he and his administration have committed (and are stil committing).

You go back to watching Fox News hosts slather saliva on your ass, Donnie. We got this from here.

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1 Comment on "The Guy Who Can’t Finish a Joe Bazooka Comic Strip Says He Read an Entire Book About Himself in One Night"

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Lou
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HEY DONNY, WHO GIVES A SHIT IF YOU READ A BOOK OF YOURSELF. IT SHOULD BE ABOUT 4 PAGES LONG FOR YOU TO READ. WE KNOW YOU COULDN’T READ THAT BOOK, AND NOW ANOTHER LIE, KEEP BELIEVING YOUR PRESIDENT, FAKE ONE AR THAT. YOU WILL GO DOWN WITH ALL OF THE REPUBLICAN SENATORS IN HISTORY AS THE DUMBEST BUNCH OF LOSER EVER TO LEAD THIS COUNTRY. YOU AND THOSE SENATORS HAVE BROUGHT THE WORST OUT OF AMERICA, AND THE LAUGHING STOCK OF THE WORLD. WE COULD NOT DROP ANY LOWER IN RESPECT FOR AMERICA AS YOU PUT US IN A… Read more »