DonkeyHotey / Flickr flynn caricatrue...
DonkeyHotey / Flickr

The standard wisdom is that once you get old, notning surprises you anymore, because you’ve seen it all before. But when it comes to the Trump-Russia investigation, you can be 12 years old and get the feeling of deja vu every time you open a paper or turn on the tv. And the statement put out yesterday by Trump’s legal Goliath Ty Cobb is a perfect example;

“Today, Michael Flynn, a former National Security Adviser at the White House for 25 days during the Trump administration, and a former Obama administration official, entered a guilty plea to a single count of making a false statement to the FBI,” (italics mine)

If this sounds vaguely familiar to you, you are not crazy, mental health help is not needed. You’ve heard it at least three times before. “I’ve never even heard of George Papadopoulos, he was a low level volunteer I think.” Or, “George Papadopoulos? He was nobody, he was the coffee boy.” And, “He was somebody on a group that only met once.” Papadopoulos was pictured in a meeting with Trump and Jeff Sessions which Trump posted to his Instagram account, and spoke on a panel at the Republican convention. And then there was the unforgettable Paul Manafort. “He was only with us for a very short period of time in the campaign, and he had no real responsibilities.” He was the campaign manager for 5 months, and ran the convention, including removing a then popular plank to help arm Ukraine rebels fighting Russia, and ran the delegate whip count to avoid a messy floor fight over Trump’s nomination. And it’s hard to even recall what Steve Bannon looks like; “Mr. Bannon is a friend of mine, but he came to us late in the campaign, He had no real effect on the outcome of the election.” Steve Bannon was the campaign chairman, a position created for him, and served in the White House as Trump’s chief political strategist.

Flynn is a problem because, duh, like Obama and stuff. I love the part about Flynn being a “former Obama administration official.” You wanna know why Flynn is a “former Obama administration official?” Because Obama shitcanned his sorry traitorous ass, that’s why! And making Obama a scapegoat for Flynn would hold a little more water if it hadn’t already been reported at the time Flynn came into the spotlight that Obama had specifically warned Trump to not even give Flynn a job emptying the west wing trash cans once everybody had gone home.

But it gets even better. Ty Cobb really shoots the moon in explaining exactly why Flynn’s copping a plea to save his treacherous self is no skin off of the Trump administrations nose;

“Nothing about the guilty plea or the charge implicates any one other than Mr. Flynn,”

You wanna be able to retire in luxury in about two years? Here’s what you do. Get a law degree from one of those prestigious universities on the inside of a matchbook cover, move to Washington DC, rent an office, and hang out a shiingle as a government defense expert attorney. It’s a good thing that Trump is planning on doing to Cobb what he does to everybody else who works for him, mainly stiffing them, because Cobb isn’t worth whatever he’s charging. No shit Sherlock. Why would the plea documents filed in federal court implicate anybody other than Flynn? The documents are dealing with Flynn’s own sins. When the indictments come out on Kushner, and Trump Jr, and Hope Hicks, and mebbe El Presidente Pendejo himself, then we’ll know just who Michael Flynn “implicated” to save himself and his son from a long term, all expenses paid vacation at Club Fed.

Right about now, I’m feeling soooo glad that Trump “only hires the best people.” because that means that putting his sorry orange ass into durance vile is gonna be a whole lot easier when it finally comes time to pay the piper. Don’t touch that dial.

Liked it? Take a second to support Joseph "Murfster35" Murphy on Patreon!


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here