Another Mystery Solved

I’ve always been pretty good at figuring shit out. Back when I could see, I was a crossword maven, and Teri and loved jigsaw puzzles. That being said, traveling the rutted shire paths of Trump’s fevered brain is tricky, mainly because it’s like navigating a telephone switchboard constructed by a 4 year old. You dial a pizza joint in Chicago, and end up talking to a Chinese hand laundry in Honolulu. So I was rather surprised last week when I learned that Mini Nunbnuts was looking to fob off Daddum’s prized possession, the Trump Washington International Hotel on some unsuspecting schnook or other. After all, what public reporting there is showed that the Trump Washington was one of the shrinking number of Trump properties that was actually making money. Why make an 8 piece bucket out of the goose that’s laying your golden eggs? But as they say in The X-Files, The truth is out there. Financial reporting geniuses like David Cay Johnston and David Fahrenthold have done an incredible job of using scant public knowledge available from the privately held Trump organization to show that Trump’s vaunted claims of financial solvency are pure hogwash. And in Trump’s recent history lies the key to his recent future in this case. Fahrenthold showed that for many years, the crown jewel in Trump’s hospitality empire was his wholly owned Trump Doral International golf resort. That property was by far and away his greatest cash cow, the anchor that carried everything else on its back. That is, it was until three years ago. What happened three years ago? Well, Trump was elected President, and harder hitting reporting than he was used to showed that he had an actual personality that made people rather associate themselves with street corner 3 card Monte dealers than him. Including the PGA tour pulling an annual tournament event from that venue. Operating profits over the last three years have declined a jaw dropping 69%, with a Trump Doral executive admitting to a Florida regulatory board that the reason was Trump’s declining name brand value. Now, there is not the slightest hint that Trump ever even considered selling his beloved Trump Doral, but let’s look at that scenario as a business hypothetical. If Trump had gotten even an inkling that his winning the presidency would be such a disaster for Trump Doral in the long term, the time to unload it would have been pre 2017, when it boasted high favorability and a steady profit flow, right? That just makes sense. Now, let’s look at the Trump International Washington Hotel, which, at least on its face, appears to be in a situation similar to the Trump Doral three years ago. Occupancy is high, and the place is making a steady profit. But ask yourself this simple question. Why is the Trump Washington Hotel enjoying such a Renaissance, after a sluggish start? Because it’s a brick and mortar version of a Super PAC, a way for both domestic and foreign business interests and governments to launder money right into the bottomless pockets of Glorious Bleater. That’s what all of those lawsuits in federal court are about. Now Riddler, riddle me this. In about 372 days, the 2020 election will be upon us. Let’s just say that the results go the way any right thinking American hopes […]

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