Kellyanne Embarrasses Herself and Trump, Again

Once again, Kellyanne Conway bravely set foot in a Fox News studio to face the blistering questions posed by Bill Hemmer. Hemmer threw the usual softball which Kellyanne promptly popped up into the stands behind her. Asked about possible impeachment proceedings, one of the few remaining Trump loyalists offered her in-depth analysis: “Complete nonsense,” she said when asked about the impeachment proceedings. “They need to get a messaging meeting and they need to read the constitution of the Democratic Party.” “Complete nonsense?” We’ll give her a pass. Her job is to do nothing but stand-up for Trump. We have bigger fish to deep-fry. “They need a messaging meeting?” Because “messaging” is what it is all about, to this administration. It is all a big reality show with “winners” and “losers” and “messaging” matters most. When has the truth ever ruined a good script? Her priority here is telling. “They need to read the constitution of the Democratic party?” Hey, she didn’t call it the “Democrat” party! Progress! Unfortunately, neither the Democratic nor Republican party has a “constitution,” only the states and the nation. So, reading the Democratic constitution isn’t necessarily going to inform anyone, other than a percentage of Trump voters who watch Fox News. (We hope it is a low percentage, but it is hard to tell.) “And they’re wasting your money and your time trying to impeach a president where there are no high crimes and misdemeanors.” Well, she is in pretty deep here. The entire reason for an impeachment proceeding is to determine the extent of “high crimes and misdemeanors.” Declaring them non-existent is simply … never mind, I suppose that is her job, too. “Stop the nonsense of harassing and embarrassing this president and the people around him when you have no constitutional or legal basis to do so.” Alright, toss aside the grammar, it’s a live interview and it’s relatively … whatever. “Harassing and embarrassing this president …” Kellyanne, the constitution actually presumes a certain level of “harassment” – also known as checks and balances – from the other branches, especially by Congress. Moreover, compared to the ceaseless “scandals” investigated by the Republican congress in investigating Bill Clinton and Barrack Obama, Trump has been granted a gift by the Democrats in not doing more. “Embarrass” Trump? You could more easily embarrass a couch. My dog looks me side-eye when he knows he’s done something stupid. Trump has never made a mistake, ever. Ask him. Trump assured us he doesn’t need to ask God’s forgiveness on anything, remember? “Embarrass” infers he cares at all what anyone anywhere thinks. The only people Trump wants to please are those who have him compromised financially. Everyone else can go to hell, quite literally. “No constitutional or legal basis to do so.” At least we’re back in the right constitutional frame! Unfortunately, the House of Representatives happens to be the only group endowed with the power to impeach, and a significant number of people, perhaps half the country, believes it has a legitimate reason. Moreover, because Trump blocks any investigative attempt, claiming “executive privilege,” illegally blocks Congress’s right to examine his tax returns, and perhaps illegally suppresses a critical whistleblower complaint, it appears there is a whole lot that Trump et. al. do not want the country to know. The framers of […]

There Is Nothing So Wretched that KellyAnne Cannot Make Worse

Nothing, and I mean nothing, makes me miss President Obama more than an appearance by Kellyanne Conway on my electric TV. Obviously, you might retort; “But of course Trump is ten times worse because he is the actual president.” Oh, yeah? Except Trump does something that makes me want to crawl under the Earth’s crust, and then Kellyanne appears on television to explain why I don’t see Trump’s inner-genius. I am more bothered by the actual human being knowing she is being a lesser life form than the lesser life form not understanding what it is to be human. If you follow what I just wrote, congrats. I sure don’t. But it feels right. Anyway, today, Kellyanne went wandering into the her favorite habitat, her land of milk and honey, the Eden we call hell, aka “Fox News.” But even Fox appeared turned off by the “president’s” ridiculous conspiracy tweet involving the Clintons. So, she got asked to explain the dangerous idiocy. Something about the question made Kellyanne sick to her stomach, because she threw-up sentence-like fragments all over my television. Now you’re asking “How bad was it, ’cause I ain’t goin’ over there to find out.” Your loyal servant as always: “I think the president just wants everything to be investigated,” Conway told Fox News’ Bill Hemmer. “There was some unsealed information implicating some people very high up.” She continued: “I will say, Bill, that there’s always this rush to ‘we need transparency, we need accountability,’ when it involves fictional accusations like collusion with Russia to swing an election. This seems to be very concrete in that Jeffrey Epstein has done some very bad things over a number of years.” Yes, there were some high-up people implicated, people like your boss, who specializes in projection. And, Kellyanne? You still didn’t answer the question. Readers? I need your help in deciphering what the ever-living-fuck the “rush to judgment” in the Russia thing has to do with anything about anything besides why Trump should be impeached. Every time I hear Kellyanne speak, I feel IQ points slipping out of my skull. You folks carrying around 140 of those things wouldn’t even miss them. I am down around 88, lose a couple and I am having trouble making change for a dollar. The only, and I mean the only, delicious irony to all this, is that she happens to be married to a man who, if they speak at all, tells her that she works for the worst president in history. He probably reminds her that she is wasting what might have been a decent career as a small town real-estate agent, had she ever learned to keep her mouth shut. I bet they don’t sleep together, either, but now we’re getting pretty far afield. A field I don’t want to even see. I should stop now, for my health and yours. As I noted, nothing quite bothers me like … no, no, my therapist said “deep breaths, deep breaths.” **** Peace, y’all. Jason jmiciak@yahoo.com

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