New Report Shows Ivanka Specializes in Money Laundering, Too

If there is a lawless hotspot on the globe, the Trumps are there. Increasingly, it looks like the Trump organization specializes in one business more than any other, money laundering. They don’t even try to hide it much, either. Ivanka might be worse at it than her daddy. A deep investigation carried out by Global Witness, an anti-corruption organization, and reported upon by Talking Points Memo, reveals that Ivanka Trump followed Don’s pattern to a “T” in the two projects most identified as “hers,” the building projects in Azerbaijan and Panama. Both projects suffered from shitty construction (duh) and “untimely bonuses” (double duh). Of course they did, Trump projects are internationally renowned for shoddy construction and untimely cash-vacuums, cash being perhaps the only thing regularly “vacuumed” at all in Trump projects, if the rumors are to be believed. So there is no breaking news to be gleaned from an investigation showing that Ivanka branded a building architecturally-inspired by Walmart, built from military surplus supplies, nor news in hearing the Ivanka was last seen heaving two garbage bags of money into a helicopter and jumping aboard. The story is in where “the money” came from to begin with. It is a story that is becoming just as associated with Trump properties as the bedbugs. It seems Trumps have a hard time taking-in “good money,” if you know what I mean: “Trump’s business approach,” wrote anti-corruption group Global Witness in a recent report, “has been to lease his name and for him and his family to drum up sales in some of the world’s dirty money hotspots, in some instances aided — knowingly or unwittingly — by networks of money launderers. The result is that Trump’s current wealth has depended in part on securing significant infusions of untraceable foreign funds.” Yes. Well, alright, people that rely heavily upon “significant infusions of untraceable foreign funds” are highly sensitive to having their taxes released that does sure seem to fit. The real story, however, is in how brazen these people are. To fully appreciate just how little the Trumps care about their obvious association with criminality requires us to “pretend” for a moment. Let’s pretend we are someone bright, but we have no business or legal background or acumen. Indeed, we have NO interest in business, law, politics … We are … veterinarians. We specialize in puppies. We are the best puppy specialists on Earth and cannot spell “IRS” if we were spotted the vowel. We are just good normal people who rely on experts when it comes to business and law. Our aunt left us a big real estate investment in Panama! We attend a meeting about our investment and learn the things that Ivanka knew. Would we not go into the street screaming upon learning that our customers for these multi-million dollar condos: Paid in cash, millions in cash. Units purchased in bulk, in cash. Purchased by shell companies just created the week before and without any other assets. Purchased in “Bearer Shares” (illegal in the Bahamas and U.K., these are, like, worse than cash in some ways.) And a highly disproportionate number of purchasers were Colombian or Russian. Now, puppy doctor with a great aunt, would you not go to your accountants and lawyers and ask: “Hey, how come we are paying a fortune to armed guards to […]

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