Resignation watch: Scott Pruitt edition.

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DonkeyHotey / Flickr Scott Pruitt Caricature...
DonkeyHotey / Flickr

You know, when you get older, you spend a lot of time thinking about, and fondly remembering, “the good old days.” Politically speaking, only in the Age of Trump can “the good old days” literally be, like, two years ago.

Resignations in a Presidential administration tend to fall into two categories, benign and malignant. Benign resignations are like amicable divorces, the couple still like each other, they’ve just grown apart. Malignant resignations are like the divorce between John
Wayne and Lorena Bobbitt.

Resignations are a part of every Presidential administration. Usually they are rather dull affairs, either the staffer or appointee just wasn’t the perfect fit the President thought they’d be, or the staffer wants to do something else for a while. But every so often, a staffer or cabinet appointee would have to resign under scandal, and that was always bad new for the sitting President, because it showed a lack of judgement. For most Presidents, a scandalous resignation meant days, if not weeks, of recriminations, finger pointing, and disastrous press. For Trump? It means it’s Tuesday.

As far as I’m concerned, we’re now officially on a resignation watch for Scott Pruitt. Even here Trump has changed the norms. A resignation watch used to be a suspenseful affair, waiting anxiously for the other shoe to drop. With Trump it’s more like the last episode of “M*A*S*H,” “Honey, don’t forget to get another 12 pack and guacamole on the way home, Pete and Nancy are coming to the resignation watch party!”

Scott Pruitt will be gone shortly, for two reasons. For one, Scott Pruitt no longer serves his main purpose as a lightening rod of scandal. Mainly, he isn’t quite as effective of a distraction as he used to be. Pruitt’s churlish behavior has been leaking out for months now, and that was a godsend for Trump. In backing Pruitt against all odds, Trump could flip double birds at the media and his critics by not demanding his resignation. And when the media was busy talking about Scott Pruitt, $43,000 “Get Smart” style cones of silence, and $50 a night condo rooms, they weren’t talking about Robert Mueller and Stormy Daniels. But since the raid on Michael Cohen, Trump-Russia and Stormy Daniels have swamped the Scott Pruitt saga like a racing boat made out of cardboard. Pruitt is now more af a liability than an asset, and in an administration with more problems than they can shake a stick at, Pruitt is the one most easily solved.

The second reason I say that Pruitt will be gone anon is because the Trump administration is signalling it. For the last few weeks, as the wolves have surrounded Pruitt, administration officials and GOP congress critters have come out of the woodwork with their torches, swinging them wildly to defend Pruitt in the media. Now, they’re starting to poke their torches at Pruitt’s gas soaked clothes.

Retiring House Oversight Committee chairman Trey Gowdy has basically opened up an active committee investigation on Pruitt’s profligate spending habits. Since when does the GOP chair of a committee investigate a GOP cabinet appointee? And the White House Office of Management and Budget chief, Mick Mulvaney, has also announced that he is actively looking into Pruitt’s excessive suckling at the federal teat. The timing here is all wrong. If Gowdy and Mulvaney were going to hold whitewash investigations to clear Pruitt, they would have done that at theĀ start of Pruitt’s troubles, and given him a clean bill of health. The fact that these two twits are looking into Pruitt’s shenanigans just when the administration goes radio silent in defending him should be a pretty clear indicator to Pruitt that it’s time to start bringing some cardboard boxes into work with him.

So, in my valueless opinion, Scott Pruitt is not long for this political world, and good riddance to him. But, on the subject, here’s a fun fact about Scott Pruitt. He’s actually suing himself! No, really. As the Attorney General of Oklahoma, Scott Pruitt sued the EPA something like 18 different times, several times on behalf of companies that were campaign donors. Last I heard, several of those cases were still actively pending in federal court. Scott Pruitt is now, at least for the moment, the administrator of the EPA. This means that Scott Pruitt is literally suing himself. Scott Pruitt, the AG dick, is suing Scott Pruitt, the EPA dick. I’m just wondering if either Pruitt dick will appeal the decision when he loses to himself. Don’t touch that dial.

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