Our Nation’s Integrity Must Be Restored

What an interesting day.  After watching the Sunday pundits savage tRump over his coronavirus response, they took up the issue of Bodies for Bucks.  My clicker fingers got tired switching away from Asa Hutchinson making weak excuses to hearing Stephanopolis ripping Chris Christie a new one and on over to Dickerson grilling Pence.  It was a good day for John McCain’s ghost.

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Here at Not Now Not Ever (NNNE) Central we have a treat for you today.  We got a chance this morning to interview Our Nation’s Integrity.  We’ve been hoping to do this for a long time.  Today, finally, Our Nation’s Integrity found some time in their busy schedule to sit down and visit with us.

NNNE:  Hi Everyone!   We’re here in Washington, DC to interview Our Nation’s Integrity.  Over the last three and one-half years Our Nation’s Integrity has been physically restrained from entering the White House grounds.  That absence has caused a lot of unnecessary misery around the planet.  In today’s episode, we’ll talk about a possible comeback for Our Nation’s Integrity this year.  I’d like to extend my greetings and welcome Our Nation’s Integrity to the Shade.  It is an honor to meet you.

Our Nation’s Integrity (ONI):  Thanks NotNow, it’s great to be here and it’s nice to finally meet you too.  I know our people have been working on getting this scheduled for a long time now.  All I can say is we’ve been really busy trying to right wrongs and make the world a better place.  By the way please call me ONI, everyone does.

NNNE:  Ok Oni, let me start by asking you what it’s been like for you during this tough time in our country, after being excluded from the halls of power?

ONI:  I got my immediate eviction notice the moment tRump put his hand on that fake Bible (people are saying he was afraid to use a real Bible because of the possibility of severe burns should he touch a real one).  At first, it was very hard on me.  I didn’t get a chance to clear out my office or say anything to my good friends:  Honor, Compassion, Honesty, Decency, Progress, Hope, Knowledge, Equality and Justice.  At the time, I hadn’t realized the republicans were trying to do away with everything that’s good about America.  We all got kicked out at the same moment.  Since then we’ve managed to reconnect and are now working closely together with Black Lives Matter, Everytown for Gun Safety, Moms Demand Action, the Southern Poverty Law Center, the ACLU and anitfa, just to name a few groups that are united in support of Our Nation’s Integrity.

NNNE:  What did you do when you got booted from the White House?

ONI:  I wandered over to the Washington Monument to sit next to that statue with the head of George Washington on the the body of Gouverneur Morris,

NNNE:  Wait! What?

ONI:  You don’t know the story.  Ok then.  They had hired a French sculptor, Jean Antoine Houdon, to do a statue of Washington, but they thought old George was too pear shaped to present a commanding figure so they grafted his head onto Gouverneur’s body (he was in Paris at the time).  Morris is one of my heroes and I like to visit with him when times are tough.  He wrote the preamble to the Constitution and lobbied very hard to have an anti-slavery clause included.  By the way if you look at that statue you’ll notice one leg is longer than the other.  It’s because Morris had a wooden (left, I think) leg.  He really deserves his own statue.

Where was I?  Oh yes, I wandered over the Washington monument and just cried and cried for hours.  Once I composed myself, I wandered up to the Capitol to see if I could help out there.  McConnell and Ryan had me locked out of the building.  I wasn’t surprised.  I haven’t been allowed in the republican Senate Cloak Room for more than forty years.  It wasn’t until January of 2019 that I was invited back in the House of Representatives.

NNNE:  Go on.

ONI:  With official Washington closed to me, I headed out into the rest of the country to work with the Resistance.

NNNE:  That must have been rough.

ONI:  You’d think so.  But after the first couple of days, we got most of the old gang back together.  Equality had already done some great work with the Women’s March and it just grew from there. We took Virginia in November of 2017 and we haven’t looked back.  When we marched, arm in arm, back into the House in January of 2019, I felt pretty darn good about what was happening in the country.

NNNE:  How do you feel now?

ONI:   I hit a real low point back at the beginning of the year when the House and Senate republicans behaved, well, like republicans.  Their actions were a direct slap in the face to Honor, Decency, Honesty, Justice and me.  Right after they acquitted Orange Judas, History told me those Senators weren’t ever going to be rehabilitated.  That made me feel a little better and we were all back out working the crowd within a couple of days.

Now that tRump’s pathetic response to the virus is directly responsible for so many deaths, I am counting down the days until he’s gone.  In the last few months he’s managed to passively kill people, tank the economy and raise rather than lower racial tensions in the country.  Yesterday we learned that his administration gave Vladimir Putin a pass on the assassination of American soldiers.  I ache for all the needless death and suffering caused by this man.  No sane person can think otherwise.

NNNE:  Wow.  That’s a strong statement on the current situation.  I hope you are getting through to his base.

ONI:  It been a hard road.  Deluded people don’t seem to like having their eyes opened.  There are a lot of Americans so deep in denial that they are being issued Egyptian driver’s licenses.  I have hope that we’ll continue to reach more and more of them, but the fact is, we no longer need their votes and can better spend our time motivating non-participants to get involved.  It would just be nice if they were able to recognize malfeasance and get upset about it.

NNNE:  Well, darn it, it looks like we are out of time.  Any last words?

ONI:  Yes.  Vote!  Dammit, get out there and vote! Get your lazy friends to vote!  We need to bury these betrayers of Justice under an avalanche of condemnation.  Vote. Vote. Vote.

Up the Resistance!

Memaliciousness

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3 Comments on "Our Nation’s Integrity Must Be Restored"

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chris whitley
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chris whitley

Tell this cupcake it’s time to go, now!

SimonDK
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SimonDK

And here I was convinced ONI was in a coma in some basement, like in the 1993 movie “Dave”
All the best from me and Holger Danske.

Independent
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Independent

I love vets ad. They will not ve quiet.