Ryan J. Reilly / Flickr jeff sessions swear...
Ryan J. Reilly / Flickr

Jefferson Beauregard Sessions is not popular in Colorado, where he threatened to enforce federal cannbis prohibition laws in order to quash the state law allowing recreational marijuana use — andthis from a states’ rights racist named after two Confederate generals. He made the same noise in California and was resoundingly laughed at, as the Golden State’s new marijuana law is set to go intoeffect Tuesday, January 2, 2018. Maybe there will be portraits of Sessions on the walls of cannabis clinics in both blue states, preferably as the background art to a dart board. Be that as it may,Sessions has been awarded the highly uncoveted distinction of Cannabis Prohibitionist Of The Year 2017:  Civilized:

There were a lot of candidates for the dishonor of being the top opponent of cannabis legalization in North America this year, but the clear winner is… (drum roll)

Attorney General Jeff Sessions, who spouts anti-cannabis quotes like a talking ‘Reefer Madness’ doll.

Before taking office as Trump’s top law enforcer, Sessions gave us many, many memorable anti-marijuana quotes. Like that time he said “good people don’t smoke marijuana,” or when he said he thought the KKK “were OK until I found out they smoke pot.” So when he was sworn into the Trump administration last January, it looked like he might have already gone through all the crazy things he had to say about weed.

But Sessions proved us all wrong when he told people that marijuana was only “slightly less awful than heroin.” Which is like saying sunburns are only slightly less awful than having your face melt off a la ‘Raiders of the Lost Ark.’

Maine and Alaska are next in line to legalize marijuana but of course Sessions’ Department of Justice is obstructing cannabis research that could improve or even save lives, and comfort the sick and the elderly. Sessions comes by this award honestly. Despite that, labor unions in California are literally squabbling with one another to see who will have the honor of representing cannabis workers. The field is expanding, literally and figuratively and everybody wants a piece of the action.  Los Angeles Times:

       Cannabis in California already is a $22-billion industry, including medical marijuana and a black market that accounts for most of that total, according to UC Davis agriculture economist Philip Martin. Medical marijuana has been legal since 1996, when California was the first state to approve such a law.    

       Labor leaders estimate recreational pot in California could employ at least 100,000 workers from the north coast to the Sierra Nevada foothills and the San Joaquin Valley, harvesting and trimming the plants, extracting ingredients to put in liquids and edibles, and driving it to stores and front doors. 

Marijuana laced chocolate sold very well during the holidays and restaurants featuring marijuana dishes are predicted to be the nouveau wave in cuisine in the very near future. You’re a dinosaur, Jeff, so come on. The cookies that you make in the big tree with all the other elves will taste so much better after you’ve had a few hits. If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em. You think Donald Trump won’t try to expand his brand into cannabis with this kind of money at stake?

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