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I an’t believe that I’m actually going to type what comes next, but it’s true what they say, “You just can’t make this shit up!”

The Roy Moore defenders have now officially sunk so low that they’re starting to bring up trinkets from sunken Spanish galleons. Breitbart senior editor Joel Pollak appeared on CNN’s New Day with Chris Cuomo this morning, and of course the topic of Roy Moore being a filthy child molester came up. But, if you haven’t already read this, you’re not gonna believe me.

Pollak used Ringo Fucking Starr to defend the allegations against Moore! I know, say wha?!? Here’s how he explained it. Moore is no worse than Ringo Starr because Ringo recorded and released a song titled “She’s sixteen, she’s beautiful, and she’s mine.” The song hit #1 on the billboard charts, and Pollak reminded all and sundry that Starr was 33 years old, singig about loving a 16 year old girl.

Are we straight on this? Why in the hell didn’t Pollak take umbrage with singer Jerry Lee Jones, who actually married his 13 year old cousin? No, instead he hauls off on Ringo Starr for recording a song he didn’t even write, about an anonymous singer professing love for a 16 year old girl. For all he knows the song could have been referring to a teenage boy talking about his girl. And one little detail Pollak manages to forget. Ringo Starr recorded a goddamn song, a work of fiction. Roy Moore is accused inappropriate sexual onduct with teenage girls, including one who was only 14. When he finds a Starr hit titled, “She’s fourteen, she’s beautiful, and she’s mine”, then mebbe we can talk. But probably not.

Welcome to GOP politics, 2017 sleaze edition. If you’re a Republican, Roy Moore bears no responsibility for, nor censure for his actual physical actions cuz, like Ringo Starr and stuff. Like I said, you can’t make this shit up.

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