Attack ads are endemic to presidential campaigns like ivy is to college campuses, so expect to see a lot more of them as we near the November finale of the Trump schitt-show. This one is Biden’s newest and it contains not only famous last lines of Trump’s that you have already heard, but some new clips of Trump abusing reporters. Napoleon had Waterloo, Hitler had the Russian front, and Trump has COVID-19. holy shit this @JoeBiden ad is good. pic.twitter.com/CAgIrt2Zua — Florida Chris (@chrislongview) March 26, 2020 Trumpty Dumpty sat on a wall, When COVID-19 came, he dropped the ball, Now all of his ass-kissers fret about when, The voters decide to take back America again. BYEDON! Exit through the west wing revolving door and don’t let it hit ya in the ass!
You know, when you cover Donald Trump, you hear a lot of shit. And after covering Donald Trump for more than five years now, I have enough of a stockpile to organically fertilize every farm in Iowa, Illinois, Indiana, and still have a clean 4ft ground cover for Bitch McConnell’s front yard. But even with all of that said, today took the cake. Even with all of the years of covering Trump, I have not seen such a weak, pathetic, whiny, infantile, self indulgent, pissy fit of temper since my grandson turned two years old. It was like watching Baby Herman when his cigar fell out of the pram in Who Framed Roger Rabbit. If Mike Pence weren’t such a pathetic, invertebrate little toad himself, he’d be running from door to door collecting cabinet signatures on his 25th amendment petition, like a kid running for class president. The Toddler in Chief pissed me off early and often today. He started almost immediately, prefacing some “new numbers” with a petulant little snit about the stock market. He whined like a jet engine about how tremendous the stock market was doing until this stupid virus came along. I swear to God, if you watch it, you can almost see his lower lip stick out as he cries about how his reelection chances are going into the shitter. But Donnie Depends was just getting warmed up. After a little more introductory pissing and moaning, he started to get warmed up. He decided to give us a crib note course on the origin and development of the crisis, which went something very much like this: This crisis started a few weeks ago, and it was something that nobody saw coming. But it started out as a purely medical crisis, and is turning into a financial crisis. It started out as a purely medical crisis, and now it’s turning into a financial crisis. And we can’t let that happen. I won’t let that happen. Sweet Jesus, Mary, and Joseph. Let’s just forget the fact that every reputable expert in the field was predicting for weeks exactly what was coming, while Trump was busy calling it a Democratic hoax. The only moron in the world that didn’t see it coming was Donald “Mr MaGoo” Trump! But here’s where the delusional insanity starts to kick in. It’s starting to turn into an economic crisis, and we can’t let that happen. I won’t let that happen. News Flash. shit-for-brains, the two have always been intertwined. Now, if you had gotten your head far enough out of your fat ass to take counsel, and if you had anybody around you intelligent enough to give it, and if you had listened, there were a myriad of things you could have done to mitigate the worst parts of the economic crisis. But no! You were too busy telling Wall Street that that rumbling noise they heard wasn’t the dam collapsing upstream. So please. Great and omnipotent Oz, enlighten me. Just how in the fuck are you going to keep it from happening?!? But then the delusions became dangerous. Because Donald Trump is through dicking around, and he has an announcement! In 15 days, we will convene. All of us up here will convene, and we will decide the time, and the method, with which we will reopen. And by that I mean reopen the […]
In the interest of public safety and interest, I’m going to provide a public service announcement. I think we can all agree that Trump’s daily press conferences to update the American public on the progress of the coronavirus are an unmitigated disaster. But there is actually a fairly simple fix to them that would make them both more effective, and more accurate. When they go out to the podium, Trump stands off to the side and lets everybody else go first! Then, when they’re done imparting actual, useful information, he can stand in front of the microphone and answer questions with pithy statements like, Uh, yeah, like he said. I realize that this won’t satisfy Trump’s craving for media dominance, but at least it will keep him from looking like the guy who just got off of his 47th consecutive ride on the Tilt-A-Whirl. This whole corona-virus thing has been nothing but one big disappointment for Trump. Trump’s whole style of leadership as President is that he walks out, sits down, fires up his child proofed Sharpie, and holds up some schlock document while the crowds swoon at his feet. Trump is not used to actually having to know shit, nor is he used to being blamed for his ignorance on said shit, and the whole thing is just starting to royally piss him off. And now it looks like we’re entering a new phase that’s only going to piss him off even more. Remember how Trump structured his company. He remained a private holding instead of incorporating, with all of the cash that could have infused, because he wanted no CEO or directors to have to answer to, or give input to. His basic management style has been described as “snake pit,” keeping employees fighting with each other so that they can’t plot against him. How many times have you heard the White House referred to in just such a description? But at the end, there is only abject obeisance. People must beg and grovel to His Lowness in order to get anything done. Trump has tried to run all of the federal government this way, micro-managing every department to ensure that his ass is properly kissed in order to get anything done. What Trump doesn’t understand is that the federal government is the place that everybody tithes their taxes too, and that everybody looks to for assistance in times of trouble. This includes state governments, who rightly look to the behemoth federal government for assistance in crises, especially national crises that they can’t handle on their own. Floods, tornadoes, earthquakes, droughts, anything unforeseen and out of their control, the federal government is the answer. And this is where Trump’s newest monumental bummer is coming from. I sincerely believe, knowing Trump’s psyche the way I do, that as the coronavirus shit hits the turbine engine, that El Pendejo Presidente has been sitting in the Oval Office, waiting for the phone to ring, as Governors like Pritzjer, Newsom, Sisolak, Inslee and Cuomo call him up, groveling at his feet, and kissing his ass for any assistance they can give to them. But it’s not happening. Oh, they’re calling him up alright, often in bunches in conference calls, but they’re not complimenting his leadership, and they’re not kissing his ass, instead they’re making demands. And what’s worse yet, once they make those demands, […]
Alex Azar and Robert Redfield have given lip service to Donald Trump’s “definitive leadership” during the coronavirus pandemic, but they’re both intelligent enough to know that Trump is a moron. Anthony Fauci has pointedly not defended Trump’s lies, so he’s apparently a bit more courageous. However, when he was sitting behind Trump today and Trump started talking stupid, Fauci had to cover his face, because he was cracking up. Take a look. Watch Dr. Fauci’s reaction when the President says the “Deep State Department” pic.twitter.com/yuJOXRuPUl — Max Lewis (@MaxLewisTV) March 20, 2020 Note on update: What you see above won’t open. It’s the original tweet, which was taken down. However, fellow zoomer PJ Evans found this one. Tip of the hat! You can spot the exact moment he died inside pic.twitter.com/griTrntI5s — marv (@mrvndn) March 20, 2020 I’m beginning to understand why Mike Pence always has that constipated look. I think it might be because he’s trying not to crack up himself. I have no doubt that Pence will carry out the party line until the very bitter end, but he must realize right now that the jig is up. ____________________________ UPDATE 10:45 a.m. PDT Friends, this is a bit alarming to report. The tweet that I referenced, and it is stellar, was pulled. It’s no longer on Twitter. It was up there probably less than twenty minutes. Trump apparently doesn’t want you to see what a moron he is or how Fauci reacted to him. I personally find this more than a little bit alarming. I will follow up on it. The conference went out live on camera and was seen by many, even if the evidence of it is being covered up. Wow. We live in interesting times. UPDATE TWO 12:17 p.m. PDT Other sources saved the moment. Many thanks to PJ Evans for capturing it. I was going to go search later on, after I finished another piece, but the community bailed me out. What a look for this administration — and I don’t blame Fauci one bit. He’s a highly intelligent man and being expected to perform in this circus must be an unbearable situation.
Ah yes, the son-in-law always rises and now it looks like it’s time for the son-in-law to set, as well. These are dark and moody days at the White House and Jared Kushner, the man who advised Donald Trump to fire James Comey, is also the same guy who advised Trump more recently: Not to declare a national emergency; To ignore his health advisers’ admonitions; and To treat the coronavirus as a PR problem. Additionally, as the cherry on the sundae, as it were, Jared is the guy who made up the Google website story, which earned Trump a sound thrashing by the press and deservedly so. Gabriel Sherman, Vanity Fair: With the markets in free fall despite emergency action by the Fed over the weekend, Trump is waking up to the reality that’s been clear to everyone: Coronavirus poses a once-in-a-hundred-years threat to the country. “In the last 48 hours he has understood the magnitude of what’s going on,” a former West Wing official told me. As Trump processes the stakes facing the country—and his presidency—he’s also lashing out at advisers, whom he blames for the White House’s inept and flat-footed response. Sources say a principal target of his anger is Jared Kushner. “I have never heard so many people inside the White House openly discussed how pissed Trump is at Jared,” the former West Wing official said. Sources told me Trump is regretting that Kushner swooped into the coronavirus response last week. Kushner, according to sources, encouraged Trump to treat the emergency as a P.R. problem when Fauci and others were calling for aggressive action. “This was Jared saying the world needs me to solve another problem,” a former White House official said. One source briefed on the internal conversations told me that Kushner advised Trump not to call a national emergency during his Oval Office address on March 11 because “it would tank the markets.” The markets cratered anyway, and Trump announced the national emergency on Friday. “They had to clean that up on Friday,” another former West Wing official said. Trump was also said to be angry that Kushner oversold Google’s coronavirus testing website when in fact the tech giant had a fledgling effort. Trump got slammed in the press for promoting the phantom Google product. “Jared told Trump that Google was doing an entire website that would be up in 72 hours and had 1,100 people working on it 24/7. That’s just a lie,” the source briefed on the internal conversations told me. And then of course there were Jared’s more substantive efforts towards solving the coronavirus problem, just in case it might not be all PR. He contacted his supermodel sister-in-law’s daddy, Kurt Kloss, who is an MD, to ask his friends on Facebook what to do. Why deal with established governmental procedures or listen to expert personnel, when you can implement policy with in-laws and Facebook? The New York Times reported that the group of doctors that Kloss solicited opinions from were “far from a group of experts” and more a “rando collection of doctors on social media.” When Jarvanka got rid of John Kelly, it was said that Jared was “walking around with his balls hanging out.” That may have been true then. But if he’s doing it right now, he might be finding out that […]
When the guy at the bar who used to play linebacker for the Seahawks stands up and tells his buddy, “Here, hold my beer,” you’ve gone a step too far. When you get home from work to find everything you own laying where it hit after being thrown out of the second floor window, you’ve gone a step too far. And when your boss doesn’t say a word, just stands in his office doorway, points at you, and crooks a finger, you’ve gone a step too far. I mention this for a reason, and as a comparison. A couple of weeks ago you had Sunshine State scumbag, and DUI scofflaw Matt Gaetz think it would be hilarious to wear a military style gas mask on the floor of the House while studying the corona-virus emergency bill. Two days before one of his constituents died from the virus, and five days before he tested positive as he was sitting on Air Force One, California creepazoid Devin Nunes went on FUX News and told everybody to support local businesses by stopping off at a pub after work and lifting a glass. A GOP Governor took heat for sending out a selfie partying down in a crowded restaurant as the crisis raged. And FUX News ghouls and Tush Limbaugh continue to snidely refer to the virus as the latest Democratic hoax. This should come as a surprise to no one. Since day one, Trump has steamrolled his way over every crisis and scandal, using bluff, sarcasm, media manipulation, and force of will, as well as arrogance and stupidity. And in doing so, he has infected the puddleheads in his caucus with the same feeling of Teflon-coated invincibility. And now when the shit really and for truly has hit the fan, they don’t understand that this time is different, so their response is exactly the same. Some pundits are saying that the corona-virus crisis will end up being the Trump administration’s Hurricane Katrina. Personally I think they’re out of their minds. The corona-virus crisis is going to make Hurricane Katrina look like a rousing success story. In Katrina, you had a bungled response to the crisis by the federal government, and a bungled and incompetent effort to not only clean up the original fuck up, but to cover up the original fuck up as well. But see, here’s the thing. At least with Katrina, there was a response! It may have been a flawed and bungled plan, but at least it was a plan! The Trump administration plan for the corona-virus was exactly the same as it is for every other crisis. They walk in front of a camera and fucking LIE! People are dying because the Trump administration’s sole response to this crisis was to undercut the seriousness of it, bolstered by the realization that there wasn’t a single person in the Trump administration who could plan out their 10 year old’s birthday party much less a national crisis response. Mr President, Welcome to Hell! You could get your fondest wish and have a miracle vaccine tomorrow, and it’s already too late. You lied. How do you think that Jefferson Davis XXVII is liking spending four hours driving around trying to find a lousy 4-pack of toilet paper? That was some Democratic hoax, huh? How do you think Don and Debbie Dimbulb […]
Harken back to the sci fi classic “War Of The Worlds.” Remember how the Martians were omnipotent and withstood everything we threw at them, until the very end when they began collapsing in droves and it turned out that bacteria was killing them? Tiny microbes defeated a foe that the vast weaponry of man could not? The coronavirus is the allegory to bacteria and what will rid us of the horrific menace of Donald Trump come November. Trump is the most destructive force we’ve ever had in American politics, let alone the White House and yet nothing seems to work to stop him. He gets away with everything. But now the coronavirus has appeared out of nature, just as the Spanish Flu did, one hundred years ago, and it’s causing the cancellation of sporting events, rock concerts, parades, and now Trump rallies. And the rallies are Trump’s reason for being. He needs the crowds more than the crowds need him. Politico: “They are his lifeline,” Bandy Lee, a Yale University psychiatrist and the editor of The Dangerous Case of Donald Trump, told me this week. “He’s very good at this,” she said, referring to the catalog of his performances at his rallies, “because his life depends on it, not just the life of his presidency but the life of his psyche.” In the estimation of Lee and other experts of her ilk, as well as the many people who have known him and worked with him for years, the way Trump is ties back to the way he was raised. The “complete emptiness inside,” the “bottomless void” that “can never be filled,” the “psychological defects” and “pathologically narcissistic traits”—all of this, says Lee, is a result of the core particulars of Trump’s upbringing: his distant and demanding father, the disruptive near-death experience of his mother when he was just a toddler, his banishment to military school when he was barely a teenager. “The lack of love translates into desiring accolades,” Lee explained. “And the rallies are really the most critical crutches that he’s had. He needs his followers more than his followers need him.” Trump biographer Gwenda Blair calls “a live audience” his “oxygen machine.” “The crowds,” former Trump casino executive Jack O’Donnell told me the other day, “get him through the night.” The crowds are what he lives for. He got into politics because of the attention. And make no mistake, Trump studied up on what attitudes and ideas would push buttons and get the most attention. Trump studied which topics would pull emotional triggers, so that he could conduct a successful political campaign and he did it to aggrandize his own ego, not because he had any interest in actually furthering a political agenda. He just wanted to bask in the spotlight and hear roars of approval. Attention is Trump’s narcotic. In the couple years before 2015, on the precampaign campaign trail, at off-year cattle calls of would-be candidates, Trump tested out talking points. “He would put forth his position or his feelings, and he would judge the level of response,” the late political strategist Pat Caddell once told me. He monitored not internal polling but Twitter mentions and tallies of retweets. He gauged what sizzled on conservative talk radio so he could channel it back. I wrote the following paragraph on Inauguration Day, thinking that […]
Donald Trump’s Wednesday Oval Office address has been universally hailed as catastrophic, being as how it elevated peoples’ fears of the coronavirus, rather than allaying them. Before Trump had finished his speech, world markets that had been set to open on the upside Thursday morning were in the process of tanking. Trump, of course, was oblivious to the chaos he had set in motion, not only with his xenophobic comments about “foreign” viruses, but also with all the inaccuracies that he enumerated. Bear in mind at all times that all Trump is trying to do is get away with this scam — not just the coronavirus, but everything in his presidency. He just wants to keep this televised mass delusion that he has perpetrated on America on the air. He has no other agenda, and he is incapable of understanding where he is and what’s at stake — not because he’s nuts, but because he is living in a delusional world of his own, never having lived in the real one. All he knows is that he’s on television, television being the only thing he’s good at, and he needs to stay there. Take a look at who the real Donald Trump is when he thinks the cameras are off. "Okayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy." pic.twitter.com/ySaGrpkQdV — David Gura (@davidgura) March 12, 2020 This is who he is. Monumentally bored, completely jaded, and more than a little bit annoyed that he has to get in front of the cameras with Jared and Stephen’s speech and try to sound like he really gives a rat’s ass about the coronavirus or the people affected by it, when he could be doing a rally and having fun. What Trump knows is that he got into politics for precisely the same reason he got into show biz — attention. In Trump’s reality, all the world’s a sound stage and all the people merely bit players to his starring role, because he doesn’t get what life is about. He’s been insulated from it by money since birth and deadened to it by ego. If it’s not about him, he’s not interested. So that’s why you got the disinterested, drawn out “okaaaaaaaaaay.” I’m surprised he didn’t come right out and say “fuck it” to be honest. It does make one think of what we would be seeing on television about the coronavirus pandemic now if we had a real president in the White House, and not a clod pretending to be a king — and pretending to give a damn. He’s such a bad actor, it’s almost worse when he tries to play it straight. On Earth 2, Pres Hillary Clinton has finished her Oval Office Address delineating how because of mass testing organized early by the gov't, universal paid leave she passed early in her Admin and her expansion of health care to all Americans, incidents of coronavirus are declining — Neera Tanden (@neeratanden) March 12, 2020 Anybody know where I can find the interdimensional portal and get to Earth 2? I took a wrong turn in the Twilight Zone and I don’t belong here. And it keeps getting weirder, to boot.
Donald Trump teased on Monday, “I will be here tomorrow afternoon to let you know about some of the economic steps we’re taking, which will be major” — and then nothing happened. Trump had a meeting with Republican senators at the Capitol, which was the right optics for the occasion, but now there’s no payoff, no plan, just empty promises. In other words, vintage Trump. Bloomberg News: “You’ll be hearing about it soon,” Trump said at the Capitol. He told senators that he’d like a payroll tax holiday until after the November election, according to three people familiar with his closed-door remarks. The coronavirus briefing was the last event on the White House’s public schedule for Tuesday. During the briefing, Trump’s top economic adviser, Larry Kudlow, said that Trump would like a payroll tax holiday to extend to the end of the year. But he declined to answer questions about how much the plan would cost or how it would work. […] But Trump’s no-show at the White House briefing may raise new concerns. U.S. stock futures opened lower Tuesday evening as investors grew concerned economic stimulus from the Trump administration was not imminent. […] “He’s calling for payroll tax relief,” Pence said of the president’s plan. “We’re going to be working with Democratic and Republican leadership to move an economic package.” In your dreams, Mike. Mitch McConnell is not pleased with this. And when McConnell is not pleased, things move at glacial speeds, if that. Trump went out there and shot off his mouth about the “dramatic” economic relief he was seeking and he did not check it out first with the powers that be, because in his delusional world, he is the powers that be. Wrong. Washington Post: Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.) has privately told several allies in recent days he personally opposes the payroll tax cut idea Trump has endorsed, according to two veteran Republicans briefed on the discussions who were not authorized to speak publicly. McConnell has made clear he “detests” pursuing this particular policy, which would probably add to federal debt and deficits, and he has said many conservative GOP senators share his view. Still, he will hear out the White House on Tuesday, they said. There was crickets from the White House on Tuesday, so as far as we know, McConnell is still not on board for this policy, and neither are Democrats, who are working on a relief package for normal people affected by the coronavirus, and not billionaires. If this payroll tax cut, opposed by McConnell, is the best plan that Trump has to roll out, his worst nightmare of an election-year recession may come true. Somebody at Fox News better cobble together policy fast, because it seems right now that Trump is not only clueless, he may be in hiding. And it is interesting to see Trump and McConnell at odds. This may be the moment we’ve all been waiting for, when McConnell decides that Trump’s more of a burden than a benefit.
Buck passing and finger pointing are part of any incompetently run organization and the White House certainly qualifies as that. Donald Trump appointed Mike Pence head of the coronavirus task force last week and went on vacation, figuring that Pence would mind the store. Instead, things got worse and White House staffers morphed into Chicken Littles, crying, “the stock market is falling!” Oh, what to do! Trump took to the airwaves, finally, late Monday, with some hastily cobbled together ideas. Politico: While President Donald Trump previewed a slate of fiscal stimulus options from the White House Monday night, other aides privately continued to debate the seriousness of the coronavirus. Officials, like Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin, had been urging staff not to overreact, while other aides advocated dramatic measures, such as shutting down borders, stopping cruise ship travel and expanding travel restrictions. Then there was the blame game. One senior administration official blamed the national security staff for bungling the early coronavirus response. Other aides blamed the vice president’s office, which has taken the lead on the response. “The Office of the Vice President seems way in over their heads,” one White House official said, referring to the coordination and messaging. “They don’t know what they’re doing.” Separately, some aides took issue with Centers for Disease Control and Prevention Director Robert Redfield, who’d dutifully stood by Trump during his Friday visit to the Atlanta agency and commended the president for his “decisive leadership.” Trump, for his part, continued to denigrate the media and Democrats on Twitter for overhyping the coronavirus threat. It stands to reason that the Trump administration is blaming everybody and everything but themselves, while the fact remains that the key problem here is that since the very beginning of this crisis it has been handled as a PR problem and not a public health emergency. All subsequent problems stem from that. That, and the fact that when Trump took office he gutted pandemic preparedness programs, firing key personnel, and when he needed them, they weren’t there. So now he has to try and reverse engineer something that will take care of this emergency. Rotsa ruck. Not too many people believe that this administration is going to rise to the occasion, after the incompetence that’s been displayed so far. Trump’s first public comment on the coronavirus was to say that, “there are only about fifteen cases and soon there will be zero.” The number of reported cases is now at 500 and the death toll is 26. Democrats would do well to emphasize this in a campaign ad. Trump loves to shoot from the hip and make things up and the covid-19 crisis emphasizes that tendency like nothing else. And unfortunately, it’s a matter of life and death.