Staff / The Daily Beast paul manafort illustration...
Staff / The Daily Beast

One really nice thing about stupid, it’s really easy to spot. And the same thing goes for arrogance too. And Paul Manafort’s lawyer just showed brilliant flashes of both in his newest response and explanation for his client trying to ghost write an op-ed defending his work in the Ukraine, directly violating a court imposed “gag order” on the case.

According to Politico, yesterday Manafort’s lawyer, Kevin Downing, gave the judge in the case a 6 page response to the prosecutions argument that Manafort had violated the courts order in penning the op-ed piece with a long time Russian backed associate, and the explanation went something like this, “But, but, but. The op-ed wasn’t intended for a US audience, it was written for a Ukrainian paper!” No shit, that’s what he argued to the court. Stjupidity this inspired deserves to be quoted directly;

“All he has tried to do is to correct the public record in Ukraine concerning his consulting activities in Ukraine,” Downing wrote in his six-page brief to the U.S. District Court for the District of Columbia.

OK, I’m sorry, but even to a moron about all things Ukrainian, there are a couple of questions I really need to ask here. First, why in the fuck would anybody over in the Ukraine give a fat rats ass about Manafort’s trial for working for Ukrainian interests in the US without filling out a FARA form in Washington DC? How are his personal and professional problems in a US court any skin off of the noses of anybody over there, especially daily readers unconnected to the government? And second, has Kevin Downing managed to exist somehow on this earth long enough to obtain a law degree and yet be blithely unaware of this little newfangled gadget called “the internet?”

Clearly Manafort’s lawyer is of the express opinion that the judge overseeing this case is a total puddlehead. There is no other explanation for him offering up this lame ass excuse. Right now his client can’t even take a dump without a US reporter telling everybody what brand of toilet paper he uses. I guess they’re trying out a take off on the old Vegas advertising slogan, “What happens in Kiev stays in Kiev.” Good luck with that one.

But apparently, keeping Manafort free from the four walls of his house are a critical issue. After all, what good are $5,000 suits if nobody but your wife and the maid can see you wearing them?!? You can tell by the lengths that they are going to in pushing this piss poor excuse. Even the actual “author” of the op-ed was forced to come out publicly and pull a Trump, “Paul Manafort? I never hearda da guy.”

An editor’s note from the Kyiv Post accompanying Voloshin’s article quoted the author as explaining that he wrote the op-ed himself and then shared it with Manafort’s longtime Ukrainian associate Konstantin Kilimnik “for fact checking.”

“It is totally mine,” Voloshin said. “Paul has absolutely nothing to do with it.”

Please, spare me. Voloshin only shared the op-ed with Manafort’s crony Kilimnik for “fact checking” purposes? Anybody who knows Paul Manafort knows that in his current situation, the last thing he’s interested in seeing is any actual facts coming to light. And besides, the last time I checked, “op-ed” stood for opinion editorial. You don’t need facts to express an opinion.

One thing I do know. If this court response filing is an accurate example of the legal b rilliance of Kevin Downing, it’s little wonder that Manafort didn’t roll over like a crocodile with a villager in his teeth and try to make Michael Flynn the fall guy, rather than worry about whether or not they have Armani jumpsuits at Club Fed. And it couldn’t happen to a nicer douche nozzle.

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