Take this with a grain of salt the size of Paul Manafort’s prostate, but based on an unkind reading of an excerpt from James Comey’s soon-to-be-released e-piss-tle, it’s possible Donald Trump inadvertently gave credence to the most salacious allegation in the now-famous Steele dossier.
Here’s the Trump quote in question from Comey’s new book, A Higher Loyalty:
“Another reason you know this isn’t true: I’m a germaphobe. There’s no way I would let people pee on each other around me. No way.”
Okay, sure, but the Steele dossier didn’t actually go into that much detail. It never explicitly said that Trump hired prostitutes to pee on each other — merely that he’d hired them to perform a golden showers show in order to defile the same bed Obama had slept in.
Here’s the relevant passage from the dossier:
According to Source D, where s/he had been present, TRUMP’S (perverted) conduct in Moscow included hiring the presidential suite of the Ritz Carlton Hotel, where he knew President and Mrs. OBAMA (whom he hated) had stayed on one of their official trips to Russia, and defiling the bed where they had slept by employing a number of prostitutes to perform a ‘golden showers’ (urination) shows in front of him. The hotel was known to be under [Russian Federal Security Service] control with microphones and concealed cameras in all the main rooms to record anything they wanted to.
Nowhere in that passage does Steele explicitly mention that the prostitutes had urinated on each other.
And a “golden shower,” according to my research (which consisted entirely of Googling the term a few seconds ago and clicking on the first Cosmopolitan article that came up) does not necessarily involve urinating on another person.
Here’s the definition, according to that august and venerable publication:
This can mean peeing on your partner, in front of your partner, near your partner, or having your partner pee on/near/in front of you. No hard and fast rules here, except that it definitely involves pee.
So this sounds a little like a Columbo episode where the killer casually mentions how the victim had been beaten to death with a French bread (or a hot water bottle full of urine or whatever) even though no one but the police knew that.
This is why Mueller would love to interview Trump. He’ll incriminate himself in the first eight seconds. Guaranteed. If he doesn’t piss his pants first.